No, it’s not difficult at all, to live in the land of Nothingness. Partly, of course, because I know it won’t last forever.
But don’t think that Being Alone Doing Nothing, is literally Being Alone Doing Nothing all the time. I still shop for food, cook, eat, have contact with people. I just don’t engage myself in any must-do-ish or have-to-do-ish tasks. In almost no tasks at all, actually. Not been writing much, done next to nil blogging, not been taking any photos. Haven’t made my bed for ages…
I have been reading some, but not the philosophy literature I intended to read. Too much engagement, I realized. For now. And those books I have read, have taken me long time to read.
I have been watching quit a lot of movies and such. Including documentaries. And have been crying a lot while watching them. I seem to cry a lot, over all and everything, these days. Even sometimes on some documentary.
It feels good!
But despite the fact I have interacted with friends the last months, most of the time I have spent alone with myself. Many hours of quiet solitude. Okay! I admit! There have been moments and even hours when I have felt terribly alone. But mostly – YES! – it has been both pleasant and awarding.
I have been listening – and trying to follow – meditation- and affirmation videos. I have been training myself to listen to my inner self. My Soul, my Intuition, my Love! Learning to listen to the Divine in me!
Among other things, I’ve realized that during my hours with friends, there are often something said or done that later pops up in my mind which makes me realize something. Something important! About me! About my inner self! And it seems so help me grow both as a human and a spiritual being.
And I consider this very good.
I feel like I now am doing some kind of retrospective on myself and my life. I am saying goodbye to my past, closing that door behind me, and preparing myself to open a new door. To my future. To a new Now.
And there are 10 days left to dwell…